A Seat at the Table

Some people find themselves in a position of power without doing anything. And some people work invisibly behind the scenes but do not have a seat at the table. Then there is me. I have the responsibility to sit quietly and listen to all kinds of people.

Members of a society depend on their leaders to consider their voices and viewpoints in making decisions. If people present what might be perceived as problems that make the leaders uncomfortable, they are less likely to be given a fair hearing. Quick answers mean that everything on the agenda gets covered, and that's what gets recorded in the meeting minutes. Divergent points of view can take more time, and they can also throw everything about the seating arrangement into question. Avoiding those types of conversations are what ensures everyone stays where they're at. I thought I knew what needed to happen to make life better for people who did not have a seat at the table. Unfortunately, my attempts to represent those points of view offended the person who was in the most powerful position at the table on more than one occasion.

I wasn't doing any better with one of the people whose viewpoint I was trying to make room for either. I found that the more enthusiastic I was about the problems and possible solutions for what this person was dealing with, the less they wanted to talk about it. My problem was a failure to communicate that I was interested in who that individual was in that situation, no matter what the problem may have been. When I started showing more interest in how that person was, and less interest in the problems they were having, it made room for them to become more aware of what was in their power to control. Their perspective became the focus of the action instead of their discomfort or my discomfort about them having a problem.

So back to the table. If what helps someone with less power than anyone else is to show an interest in how they are doing, why would it be any different for someone with more power than the rest of us to develop a greater awareness? If we are able to sit quietly and observe the discomfort we feel about what our community leaders may be lacking, that may provide them with the needed time and space to explore different perspectives. I think everyone has a need to know that who they are matters as much as what they do.

Some people in positions of power achieve more by doing less, and receive whatever blame or credit results from that. Some people who have the greatest impact, and who get the most work done, move forward without needing any direction and are hardly recognized for what they have done. Then there is me. I have the responsibility to sit quietly at the table.